Is when that song plays on the radio.
That makes you breathe in deeply and sharply.
That makes you pause as images flash infront of your eyes.
When ancient feelings are roared to life again.
And you taste a life once, all over again.
That's what one sharp intake is.
I just watched the trailer for the upcoming movie, Once Upon A Time in Mexico. It's the sequel for Desperado which was actually entertaining, despite the B acting. The sequel looks to be something quite good but I refuse to have my hopes raised. No, don't tempt me with free tickets to the movie premiere either.
Oh common, atleast try.
In other news, I have procastinated my Flash project till the last minute, despite having over 5 spare days to work on it. Now, I'm planning on working around the clock till I can make it work.
The weird thing is, when I start putting effort into it, I end up realizing how much fun it actually is. This is a repeated pattern, which has occured so far with Photoshop, Dreamweaver, CSS and many more.
But if I can get my dad's 1.6Ghz laptop from the other side of the globe, then perhaps things will change drastically. I could get my work done a little earlier, be more organized, tackle more work, solve advanced problems, take on ethical debate teams in a stride, write award winning essays to topple corrupt governments local and otherwise-
Wait. No, yeah I'm pushing my dreams so i'll back down. Let's just focus on grad school assignments for right now, shall we?
And it's fun to start cooking again. This is the third time I've cooked in my new place and it's been great success. I think I mostly define success as food being edible. But I can start raising standards from now on. From now on, I will actually focus a little more taste too. From now on, I will actually experiment in variety outside of it being "holyCOW!We need water, large quantities of it now".
I recall that dinner I made for the two of us, before our math exam. You were starving, I was too lazy to study all the way over at your place and I lured you to my place. The chicken was tender, with tons of "gravy" to eat with rice. And it had in it green chillies, red chili powder and tablespoons of black pepper.
It has been the only time in my life my stomach started rumbling of extreme discontent, despite those large ice cold glasses of pop.
I've never repeated that recipe again.
What is self-respect?
Perhaps it is the ability to look yourself in the eye, to peer through the murky waters of your conscience.
The water exists, a pond for each one of us. It contains everything, pebbles, larger rocks, frogs and water snakes. There grows weed and over hanging grass on the edge.
And at the bottom of each pond lies the dirt, the pebbles, rocks, leaves that fall into us and gently float to the bottom. Sometimes gently, sometimes not.
Murky waters that be, how much mud can there be.
Self-respect is how long you can stay by that pool of water, nurturing it and be living to bide by it.
Be calm waters, I beg of you.
I know.
I am of a guilty soul.
Traitor to fellow typepadders.
Traitor to my own mind.
Just a traitor. A simple one, not a complex back stabbing double crossing mega cheating one. No no, I barely have time to blog here let alone be that complicated a traitor.
I have tons of lovely ideas. For those who frequent here and find nought, cry not tears priceless over me.
I blog here too.
How's this for a bite though. This entire week, I'm either in classes, or I'm at a Lego Robotics camp as a tech advisor, though I know jack. I'm more of a handy man. I would be anything to be at this camp, for free, for gifted highschool students who we mentor.
And I found out today that we have too many students, not enough full time mentors and that next week, I am to be elevated to a mentor status too.
Amen to a God Merciful and Most Generous.
I woke up today, determined to get my work done. I have grad school assignments ahead of me, reading to do and a lot of serious pc work. I woke up, showered, prayed and had some cantaloupe for breakfast, whilst watching ET.
Instead, I worked for a couple of hours, packed up and walked home, in the gorgeous sun. It took me almost 35 minutes to walk all the way, each step worth the effort. The half cloudy sky, the passion burning sun, the whispering wind that blew by.
I came home, cooked dinner for the first time in this new house and let the slide door open, the storm door letting in the wind.
A meal is best eaten on a wooden plate, swirling with natural tree patterns and a good set of knives/forks. Bare feet, and a gusty wind to tingle the toes.
And a well cooked pasta sauce.
Ciao.
I discussed the idea of a blog research experiment for Fall semester with my professor. I can't believe he actually liked the idea, and wants me to further explore it. This can't really be happening, where I get to conduct my own research in a field of interest.
Huh.
Here's a summer plan. I live but a block from the river, the park my personal backyard. Two miles south, up the river, a creek meets the river. Just there, a few stone throws away, is a natural pool to laze around in, designed just for hot weather sauntering in the water. Insha-allah by this weekend, I'll have me a bike so I can ride up there as often as the heart pleases and just lay back and relax.
That's one plan. Another is to go the other way, north, just by the side of the river and find other places to dive into. I've seen fishermen with their boats, rods hanging, a bait hidden underwater, a delicacy for those who please. Perhaps I can rent a boat, for a half-day and just loung on the river, a hay straw in my mouth, a straw hat on my head, pant legs rolled up and a book on the other hand.
A Huckleberry Finn, a Tom Sawyer in the making of my world.
I'm just now reading about Blogathon2003. The event itself sounds amazing. To blog every 30 minutes for 24 hours, and based on how long you last, your supporters will donate that much to a specified charity. It's much like running a marathon, and for each mile -
*interruption*
"Hey O, check this out", I show O.O. the blogathon info. "What do you think?"
"Do it! That's so you, haha, 24 hours huh, oh yeah, do it man. Wait, when is it?" he chuckles back, naturally obviously amused at the idea.
*and then back*
Sat July 26th : 6AM Pacific Time : 24 hours : 30 minutes.
The thing is, I know I can do it. Though i'm concerned about what to write about, I'm sure it'll come to me, I have time to prepare and as of right now, I already have a few draft entries and I can write more ideas meanwhilst. I know I can do this, I can get movies, books, friends to keep me up.
What perhaps is the primary concern is who will be willing to support me, and donate some meager amount (yet in the sight of Allah, even a date given in charity...). So here's a simple test. I'm going to try and make a list of people who would be interested in sponsoring me for this event. If a sufficient number of people help out then I would go through with it.
Now, why would you want to participate in such an event and sponsor me in the first place?
1) You're donating to charity, to help make someone elses's life better. None of your money comes to me. It'll be a charity of my choice but you are more then welcome to recommend some.
2) It's morally uplifting. To me, to you, to the others who read of such an event. Be a catalyst, be someone elses' inspiration.
3) Depending on how much you donate, you get special mention on my blog and other possible "prizes":
3a) An entry dedicated to answering a question of your choice.
3b) Help on your website design
3c) A phone call conversation (though I doubt people will actually avail this)
3d) Suggest your own prize for a price =)
I realize that I'm going into this a little unprepared and unplanned. There are a lot of ways I can go about improving this right now. But I'm still not pledged and I would like to atleast get a few sponsors before I dig my feet in.
So, here's the deal so far: Comment/eMail a charity, comment/eMail if you would like to sponsor.
Honestly people. I would really appreciate it. We could give to some amazing charities, and help out people who are worse off then us, both here and abroad. Tell your friends, ask them, and finally, request of them.
Great. I love it when I make a plan on 4 hours of sleep after being up for over 14 hours to yet stay up for an additional twentyFour hours on a saturday mornin'.
NOTE: if you wish to remain anonymous, you can email me and we can talk this out more easily.
"It's annonymous, right?" She asks. And smiles.
"Mhmm", I answer back with a grin.
So then, with permission, I let this come out:
She has a smile beautiful, radiating with it a sincerity and pleasure otherwise hidden in her graceful movements. It's a hidden secret that she displays at will, unknown even to herself perhaps. It's a smile that can break walls within if it dares, if you're not prepared for its absolutely jubilant impact.
Such items fall in a special genre, a list that exists in each one of our minds, each list, like each mind, different and overlapping. The list contains rarities in the world today, paralleled for eons in the hidden works of poets unpublished.
I think can see why such a smile exists. I just hope one day I can smile like that too. Or atleast, find one just for me.
Recent Comments